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Krakatoa Lava Lamps 04-06-1814
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Breaking News
Tuesday, April 5th, 1814: Alcatraz Whitewashes Lava Lamps
Sewer Ferrobeiro was stingy with runs in his latest outing against the Lava Lamps. He shut them out 2-0 on 3 hits with 2 strikeouts and 2 walks.

The Alcatraz manager said, "Sewer was very aggressive tonight. He threw everything he had with a lot of confidence."

The losing manager had praise, too. "He was throwing strikes with all his pitches and mixing it up well. Ferrobeiro has a sneaky fastball, and whatever that offspeed pitch was, it was keeping our timing off."

Tuesday, March 15th, 1814: Holton Injured, Out of Lineup 1-2 Weeks
The Krakatoa Lava Lamps were dealt a serious blow when the team learned that Raymundo Holton was likely to be out for 1-2 weeks after he injured himself making a defensive play in today's game against the Malta Falcons. A round of tests by the team doctors revealed the injury to be sticky fingers. Upon learning of their diagnosis, the Krakatoa manager told the press, "As you all know, we can't control injuries--they are a part of the game. We just have to do the best we can until Raymundo is back in action."

Sunday, March 6th, 1814: Veteran Conzuesra Signs 3-Year Deal
Lava Lamps officials confirmed today that they have inked a deal with Queeg Conzuesra.

The 35-year-old left fielder will net $350,000 a year, and will call Krakatoa home for 3 years.

Conzuesra has put up a career batting average of .326 with 371 hits, 44 homers and 184 RBIs.
Team Leaders AVG
R. Holton
.357
2Q. ConzuesraKRAK.263
3B. StranskyKRAK.222
4P. bin MusaKRAK.125
5V. AltmanKRAK.111
Team Leaders HR
P. bin Musa
1
2V. AltmanKRAK0
2A. AquilloKRAK0
2F. AtwellKRAK0
219 more tied with 0
Team Leaders RBI
P. bin Musa
6
2R. JacobsonKRAK4
3Q. ConzuesraKRAK1
3R. HoltonKRAK1
3B. StranskyKRAK1
Team Leaders W
2 tied with
1
1A. AquilloKRAK1
1H. VelazcoKRAK1
3B. DemisovskiKRAK0
37 more tied with 0
Team Leaders ERA
A. Aquillo
0.00
2S. ZuckerKRAK1.13
3G. WelshKRAK2.00
4D. LallyKRAK2.57
5H. VelazcoKRAK6.00
Team Leaders K
D. Lally
6
2H. VelazcoKRAK4
2G. WelshKRAK4
4C. VereKRAK3
53 tied with 2
Injuries
PlayerInjuryOut for...Disabled List Status
P Rowland Darraghhyperextended boner2 weeks5 day(s) left
Pitching Staff
RoleThrowsPitcherWLSVERA 
StarterRGrant Welsh0102.00 
StarterRSnake Hips Zucker0101.13 
StarterRArmondo Aquillo1000.00 
StarterLHummer Velazco1006.00 
StarterLDuck Lally0102.57 
Middle RelieverLHerold Ferrermena0000.00 
Middle RelieverLBurhan Kringos0000.00 
Middle RelieverLMonty Santillana0000.00 
Setup RelieverRJacoby Halstead0000.00 
Setup RelieverRBarbarian Demisovski0000.00 
CloserRCucumber Vere0010.00 
News

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Minor League System

Standings
WLPCTGB
Rhode Island Scholars41.800-
Alcatraz Birdmen32.6001.0
Bikini Island Bombers32.6001.0
Majorca Labias32.6001.0
Malta Falcons32.6001.0
Shag Rocks Wandering Albatrosses32.6001.0
Solomon Islands Miners32.6001.0
Isle of Man Whores23.4002.0
Krakatoa Lava Lamps23.4002.0
Manhattan Cocktails23.4002.0
Ceylon Intruders14.2003.0
Elba Corps14.2003.0

Team Information
Record overall2-3, .400 PCT
Position in Division9th, 2.0 GB
Record at home2-3, .400 PCT
Record on the road0-0, .000 PCT
Record in X-inning games0-0, .000 PCT
Record in one-run games1-2, .333 PCT
Record versus LHP1-3, .250 PCT
Record versus RHP1-0, 1.000 PCT
Record last 10 games2-3, .400 PCT
Record in April2-3, .400 PCT

Team Batting Stats & Rankings
Batting Average.192 - 12th in RIBC
On-Base Percentage.281 - 9th in RIBC
Slugging Percentage.247 - 12th in RIBC
On-Base + Slugging.528 - 12th in RIBC
Runs Scored13 - 10th in RIBC
Hits28 - 12th in RIBC
Extra-Base Hits5 - 12th in RIBC
Home Runs1 - 10th in RIBC
Bases-On-Balls16 - 3rd in RIBC
Strikeouts21 - 3rd in RIBC
Stolen Bases2 - 7th in RIBC

Team Pitching Stats & Rankings
Earned Run Average 1.80 - 1st in RIBC
Starters' ERA2.13 - 2nd in RIBC
Bullpen ERA0.00 - 1st in RIBC
Runs allowed9 - 1st in RIBC
Hits allowed34 - 2nd in RIBC
Opponents AVG.212 - 2nd in RIBC
BABIP.233 - 2nd in RIBC
Home Runs allowed3 - 6th in RIBC
Bases-On-Balls9 - tied for 2nd in RIBC
Strikeouts24 - tied for 8th in RIBC

Minor League System
Leicester Molesters (AAA)
Jodhpur Red Dots (AA)
Kenya Sparadimes (A)

Lineups Overview
#BLineup vs RHPPOS #BLineup vs LHPPOS #BLineup vs RHP+DHPOS #BLineup vs LHP+DHPOS 
1RVintage Altman2B 1LBig Boy StranskyRF 1RVintage Altman2B 1RDumpy WertheimRF 
2LBig Boy StranskyRF 2RRaymundo HoltonCF 2LBig Boy StranskyLF 2LBig Boy StranskyLF 
3LQueeg ConzuesraLF 3LQueeg ConzuesraLF 3LQueeg ConzuesraDH 3LQueeg ConzuesraDH 
4LVee Neck Lyall1B 4RPepper bin MusaC 4LVee Neck Lyall1B 4RPepper bin MusaC 
5RPepper bin MusaC 5LVee Neck Lyall1B 5RPepper bin MusaC 5LVee Neck Lyall1B 
6RRaymundo HoltonCF 6RVintage Altman2B 6RRaymundo HoltonCF 6RVintage Altman2B 
7SJohnny Buckley3B 7RRip JacobsonSS 7LBusboy TannerRF 7RRaymundo HoltonCF 
8RRip JacobsonSS 8SJohnny Buckley3B 8SJohnny Buckley3B 8RRip JacobsonSS 
  9RRip JacobsonSS 9SJohnny Buckley3B 

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